M officially started Kindergarten last Friday.
Everybody told me I would cry.
As I put him on the bus Friday, it wasn’t tears I felt.
My head was filled with what ifs.
What if he can’t open his apple sauce?
What if he can’t unbutton his pants and has an accident?
Those are normal Mommy what ifs.
It was the other what ifs that popped in my head that I tried to push away as soon as I thought of them.
What if his bus driver gets hijacked by some crazy and M gets kidnapped?
What if some whackadoodle goes into his school guns a blazing?
What if some kid brings a gun to school and goes guns a blazing?
When did these what if become the norm in our society?
The saying goes “Guns don’t kill people, people kill people.” Yeah, well, people seem to be using a lot of high powered assault weapons on school children lately.
Ronald Reagan said: “. . . I do believe that an AK-47, a machine gun, is not a sporting weapon or needed for defense of a home.” (2/6/89)
That line was from a speech given after a school shooting in Stockton, CA in January of that year. 24 years has passed and we still have to kiss our babies goodbye on their way to school and deep down hope that at least one of our What Ifs don’t come true.