Eek.

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So. Um. This just happened.
My 3 year old was quietly playing with his legos. I went to see what he was doing and saw this.

Me: Um. D. What’s going on here?
D: Mommy,  its a head factory.  They need new heads.
Me: Um. Uh. Um. OK.  How about you go watch Paw Patrol?

What the puck!?!?!?
I shouldn’t panic,  right?  I mean, it’s not normal.  But. But, it’s not not normal.  Right?

Oh dear.

Eat It! Or Don’t. Piggy Pie.

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving in the U.S.

This is traditionally a day for stuffing our faces with all sorts of comfort food.  I just read a statistic that says Americans consume over 3000 calories on Thanksgiving.   That’s a lot of pie.

Don’t tell anyone, but pie is not my favorite dessert.  If it doesn’t have frosting (butter-cream, not that cream cheese or whipped cream bullshit)  I’m not a fan.

Despite my lack of love for pie, I am OK at making the traditional Thanksgiving pies.  Pie filling is actually super easy to do.  OK, it’s only easy because you mostly open up some cans and pour that into a pie crust.

Pie crust is something that I will never, ever, ever try to make from scratch.  You remember my bread disaster?

My father in law requested cherry pie for tomorrow so I decided to give that a try.  My plan was to use one of those pie crusts that you can just unroll and place on top of the filling.  Like this.

My ideal cherry pie (image from the google search)

My ideal cherry pie
(image from the google search)

When I tried to unroll the pie crust, it started to come off in chunks.

What to do?  What to do?

I ended up using the pig cookie cutter I had and placed those little guys on top of the cherries.  Then I egg washed them and placed cinnamon and sugar on top.   Not to brag, but. I think the pie came out looking pretty good.

Piggy Pie

I’m calling it Piggy Pie, in honor of how much we will be pigging out.

I hope it tastes alright.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Keeps Me On My Toes

Friday was one of those weird days where D (the three year old) did and said things that kept me on my toes.

It started when he came down the stairs in the morning telling me he was mad at me.

“Why, baby?”

“Because you turned me blue.”

He woke up angry at me for turning him blue in his dream.  In his dream, people. His dream!

“Oh, well, I’m sorry about that.  Wasn’t it great being like a smurf?”

“No, MOMMY!”

Um, ok.  At least he knows his colors.  I could have turned him polka dot.

A few hours past and I was watching a show where someone got a statue of a poodle.

“Look, Mommy.  It’s a moose.”

“No, kiddo.  It’s a poodle.”  This one actually made me giggle for a while.  Also, it reminded me that we need to go to the zoo again, soon.

A little later, this needed to happen.

wookie_shower1

It was too quite.  D had gone to the bathroom and I was really hoping that he was going in there to try to go, you know?  He still refuses to potty train.

Nope.  He had the Wookie, aka Rookie, in the cat box walking in the litter.    At least it was a part of the box that hadn’t been used, yet.

I washed the guy in serious cleaner and then rinsed in super hot water.

Being a Mom is never dull, that’s for sure.  I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Losing It! Motivation

fitness_motivation

It’s happened.   Hard core.

I lost the motivation I once had to lose weight and to eat healthy.

The last time I worked out at the gym was three weeks ago.  The last time I worked out was that 5 1/2 mile walk last Monday.

I’m not eating right either.  I had vegetables with my Chinese food for lunch today.  But those veggies were slathered in sauce.  I’m debating about making peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for lunch because I’m not in the mood to cook.

Inner Dialogue Time.  Or soliloquy, if you will.  And I will.

I don’t want to be fat again.  I won’t.

So what do I need to do?

Bitch.  Put. Down. The. Chocolate.

Grab the gym bag that you packed three weeks ago and head to the gym.

You better work.

And yes, my goal is to be a supermodel.

Not really.

I would need some serious facial reconstruction surgery for that.

Social Media Failure. Link This.

I googled LinkedIn on my phone and it autocorrected itself with Let’s Get Naked.

Whaa????

Of course, I giggled for a few minutes.  I mean.  I do need a job.  But, I’m fairly certain that LinkedIn isn’t used for that type of work. I mean, it could be.  And that would be OK.  I’m not judging peoples professions.

I kept getting emails saying I had requests to connect so I figured it was time to hop back on that website.

Only.  I hate going onto LinkedIn.  I know people say Facebook makes people depressed.  But not me.

Looking at LinkedIn makes me feel like a big pile of dog shit.  I seriously start to get a panic attack looking at all these people in one of my former “professional” lives.  Don’t get me wrong, I’m actually really happy for all these people who are Senior Directors or Vice President of Such and Such.  But shitttttttttt.

Here’s my question.  Do I ‘connect’ with people who I’m also friends with on FB?  I typically don’t.  It’s just that if we do something that is of a professional nature, sure. But I’m not going to connect with you just because we met once at a party years ago and your FB posts make me laugh.

I really must not be using LinkedIn to its potential.

Is LinkedIn worth it??

Only Patch

My Dad, Patch, is a petty ‘cool dude.’ His words, not mine.

He came over bright and early to watch the boys while I went to a Parent Teacher Conference today.  
He brought doughnuts for the boys.  He brought the vacuum for me. 

Sidenote: we can’t keep a vacuum cleaner alive in this house.   We went through two in one month.  I didn’t ask him to bring it. He thought I needed it.

By the time I got home from the conference,  my Dad had vacuumed all the rooms that needed it.  He even cleaned the cat box.  And washed it.  He told me three times that he washed it.

We all went to drop off the youngest at preschool and then came back home.

That’s when my Dad went a tiny little bit crazy.

He took the vacuum to my garage.

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I’m not sure my Mom would like the thought that the house vacuum cleaner was used for my garage.

My house is not that much of a mess.  I actually mopped the hardwood floors yesterday.   Its just when Patch has a bee in his cap you just step out of the way and let him do whatever he needs to do.

I love him. He drives me crazy sometimes.  But I love him.